Sexuality is frequently omitted from our historical narratives, and the presence of LGBT individuals in ancient civilizations is seldom highlighted in television documentaries.
Men were assumed to be attracted to both males and females, and to express a preference for just one sex was considered eccentric.
But as both societies were intensely patriarchal, what was important in sexual relationships was the status of who did the penetrating and their age.
In this world, the notion of sex between two grown men was deeply taboo as it was seen to reduce the passive partner to the level of a woman. Indeed if the Greeks and Romans did not outlaw it, it was because the shame of the act was punishment enough – though the weight of shame fell mostly on the penetrated.
Of greater taboo still was for an older man to allow himself to be penetrated by a younger man; the modern word ‘pathetic’ derives from the Latin for such a man.
The only act considered more taboo was cunnilingus – to the Ancient’s minds as dangerously close to a man being penetrated by a woman as was possible.
Contrary to popular belief, anal sex for the Greeks and Romans was primarily a heterosexual act. There was no taboo on it occurring between men and women and it was the most reliable form of contraception available, and so would have been a regular part of the sex lives of any married couple.
Where sex between males was deemed acceptable to occur was between men and youths, and in theory, it was only supposed to be inter-crucial (where one partner grips the other’s penis between his thighs), though from the writings the Greeks and Romans have left to us, it was often not.
In both societies, youths were considered to be able to consent to sex from around their mid teens, which was similar to the age that girls were considered ready for marriage, and it was acceptable for youths to be in same-sex relationships until they could grow a full beard; and for this reason, there were all manner of depilatory products on sale in order to help you keep your boyfriend respectable!
After this age in Greece, the young man was expected to find a wife and go about starting a family, having been mentored by his older partner, with the two men staying friends. In practice, however, many of these relationships probably would have carried on behind closed doors. In Greece, such relationships occurred between free born males, though there were also male prostitutes.
Many of the most famous names to come down to us in history from the Greek world have been same-sex attracted – from bisexual Alexander the Great whose father Phillip destroyed the all-gay Sacred Band of Thebes, to the philosophers Plato and Socrates.
Few lesbian voices come to us from the ancient world but the lyric poet Sappho is a notable exception and her love poems for other women speak down to us through the ages. And of course, the island of her birth, Lesbos, gives us the word ‘lesbian’ that we still use today.
Sex between women wasn’t illegal, but, like the Victorians, the Greeks and Romans simply refused to believe it happened. In comparison, sex between men in the Roman world was a mostly more sinister affair. Having sex with a freeborn Roman male could see you up on charges for ruining the youth’s future reputation. But slaves and foreigners were all fair game. Male and female prostitutes openly plied their trade on the streets of Rome. But in truth, any slave was a sex slave if their master so desired, and it was primarily through master-slave relationships that sex between males occurred in Ancient Rome.
Thus when the emperor Hadrian took a male lover in the form of a Bithynian youth named Antinous, as a foreigner, it was perfectly acceptable for Antinous to appear in public next to the emperor and his wife, Vibia Sabina, as his lover. Hadrian and Antinous were lovers for five years until Antinous fell from a boat in the Nile and drowned. Some have suggested he killed himself to avoid shaming the emperor as he grew older. Heartbroken, Hadrian had Antinous declared a god, built temples to him all over the empire, named a star after him and built a city in Egypt, Antinopolis, in his honor.
When the Roman Empire became Christian, the temples of the cult of Antinous were destroyed, though many of the statues ended up in the Vatican art collections where they were seen by the artist Raphael, who used his likeness when painting angels as his model of male perfection.
.
Both the Greeks and Romans found justification for their actions in religious beliefs, although contemporary perspectives on morality may differ.
In Greek culture, Zeus maintained a romantic relationship with Ganymede, which Plato regarded as a superior form of love compared to that within marriage. The Romans, sharing similar deities with different names, transformed Zeus into Jupiter and Ganymede into Catamitus. While homosexual individuals were often ridiculed in comedic Roman performances, the streets simultaneously teemed with same-sex couples, cross-dressers, and male prostitutes.
Despite the mockery, some couples defied societal discrimination by publicly celebrating their commitment through same-sex marriages. Notable instances include Emperor Nero and Elagabalus, among others. These marriages lacked legal recognition, and by 342 AD, Christian emperors Constantius and Constans prohibited them under the threat of death. This suppression endured for centuries, silencing homosexuality in the Roman Empire.
Assessing how Greek and Roman civilizations treated their LGBT citizens yields a complex verdict. Discrimination and severe social stigma characterized relationships between men that deviated from stringent norms. However, when compared to the repressive attitudes prevailing well into the 20th century, these ancient civilizations demonstrated a level of acceptance that positioned them centuries ahead of their time.